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Is success a dirty word?

Hello guys

for a while now there has been a quote floating through the internet that has been credited to the Dalai Lama saying that

“The plain fact is that the planet does not need more successful people. But it does desperately need more peacemakers, healers, restorers, storytellers, and lovers of every kind. It needs people who live well in their places. It needs people of moral courage willing to join the fight to make the world habitable and humane. And these qualities have little to do with success as we have defined it.”

Actually this was originally a quote by David W.Orr if my research is right, but for the sake of this newsletter it really doesn't matter who said it, but it does hit a nerve. When I first read it on top of a picture of the Dalai Lama I had very mixed feelings about this quote, knowing that it would give a lot of people the excuse they needed to NOT go for their dreams. It would also allow people to feel that it is better for the world that they are not successful and that made me very sad.

Do I disagree with the quote? Not at all. I actually feel it is spot on and we need more people who care for the greater good, who are healers, peacemakers, storytellers and lovers of every kind. But I never understood why that stood in opposition to being successful.

The people I work with are often exactly that: storytellers, healers and lovers of all kind and they are often very successful with it and yet it is this word SUCCESS that often creates a massive resistance in them to actually go out and do what they love most, what they know can touch the hearts of many and may even heal them. They hold back with their talents because being successful has become such a dirty word…

But let me explain: the first thing we need to do is to address what success actually means and especially what it means to you.
As used in this quote, Success is often read as the better lifestyle, the sexy partner, the fancy car, the big house and an overflow of money in the account. Having all you want on the outside. Still I don't see anything wrong with it in its essence, however if the money and the external belongings are all that measures up to equate success we do indeed have a problem.

If the only drive is to have more than the next person, come in first, and accumulate more of what we don't really need, then yes - We don't need more successful people. And I have worked with enough clients who had all that, who were incerdibly successful and yet were incredible unhappy, torn and empty at the beginning of our journey together. They were mostly confused that they can't be happy now that they have achieved what they thought would make them happy..

And here lies the clue to what success really means, at least to me.

The oxford dictionaries define success like this:
The accomplishment of an aim or purpose!

I believe that aim or purpose is always to be happy!!!

Happy with who I am, being able to explore and expand my talents whatever they are. Living what I was put on this earth to do (and that does not have to be some big purpose of healing the world, this can be anything that fills you with joy and makes your heart sing.) Success to me means being able to live those qualities and sustain myself with that in a lifestyle I feel suits me. And if you reach that level of happiness first and it reflects in the house, the car and lifestyle, than that is a beautiful and inspiring thing to see. It always was for me, because it allows others to live their purpose and dreams as well.

But why am I so passionate about this? Because I see so many people who don't allow themselves to be successful. Or when they are they dont allow themsleves to be happy in living their dreams. They sabotage themselves in their successes for various reasons. Some might fear that they will fail along the way and so they hold back, others don't want to take the risk of being laughed at or are scared of what it means when they leave the inner circles they have known. One thing I have learnt over the past 9 years of working with the high achievers in various industries is that THE FEAR OF SUCCESS is as real as the FEAR OF FAILURE.
And often it has to do with what I feared the quote above will do. Success becomes a dirty word!

We might feel judged for our drive. We are afraid of loosing our friends and not being loved the same way we are now. Will they only like me for my achievements then? We might believe that all successful people are liars and therefore we cant allow ourselves to ever be successful.

In the last 2 talks I gave I did an exercise for people to explore their innermost believe about success and about themselves. And interestingly enough in both talks people's mindset around successful people was: They are annoying! And this came from guests whose aim is to be successful. Why would you allow yourself to be something that you won't like?

Do you see the dilemma? In their belief system becoming successful will ultimately mean that they will also become annoying and that they will have to choose. Be nice or be successful.
And of course that has nothing to do with the truth. It is just a belief that will hold you locked in firmly of struggling with being successful.

So I say the world needs successful people, because what the world really needs is people who are happy to be who they truly are, with all their magnificence, sharing their talents. Just imagine the healers, lovers, peacemakers and storytellers we would have. Their aim and purpose of being truly who they are would inspire everyone else to do so and in my humble opinion this sounds a rather beautiful place to be in.

So what are your dreams and desires, what makes you really tick and your heart overflow with joy? And are you aligned with being successful in being that? Are you aligned with being successful in being you and let your world reflect that?

In this week’s trance coaching session we will address exactly that. We will help you not only allow yourself to be successful, but align with your true self and talents, so you can be what you were born to be: You, happy and successful. Everything else is just a script I would advise you not to follow anymore.

Join us in the online trance group here if you are not a member yet. The TC group is a monthly membership where you not only get your regular new trance coachings with what I call a mini workshop before hand, but you also have access to all past trances on Self acceptance, releasing the fear of not being loved, chakra balance and releasing the resistance to positive change and more.

Here is to your success, your magnificence and who you are meant to be!


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